One bite at a time

There is an old joke that asks, "How do you eat an elephant?" The answer is, "One bite at a time."

This saying, to me, is a great reminder of the work that Amachi sets out to accomplish in this community. Mentoring kids impacted by incarceration is often not pretty. It's not glamorous. There isn't often a white glowing light indicating that a child's life has been changed. More often that not, it is frustrating. More often than not, a mentor can be left asking the question, "Am I really making a difference?" I would answer here, "Yes, you are. One very small bite at a time."

Amachi Central Kentucky recently hosted a mentor celebration breakfast. We invited all of our mentors together for some free (and very yummy!) breakfast and for some celebrating. As someone on staff, I have the privilege of seeing things from the outside. I speak with the parents and their kids about how much they love their mentors. I see the deep love that develops week after week. I see what a difference an hour a week can make. Still, when one is in the thick of it, the change can be difficult to see.

At our breakfast, we invited our mentors to share about their experiences of mentoring a "child of promise." A few folks shared some insightful and inspiring stories, or funny things that had occurred. I loved hearing what everyone said. One mentor's story, however, stuck out to me. A couple of our male mentors had shared about the boys they have been working with. Unknown to each other, both of the boys happen to attend the same elementary school. After they shared, a female mentor stood up, and with tears in her eyes, began to share a different perspective. She shared that she was a social worker at a local elementary school-the same school that both of the boys attend. She then went on to witness to the difference she has seen in the boys since they have had mentors. She remarked on improved behavior, increased school performance, and she even remarked that one of the boys was recently the student of the month. She then encouraged all of the mentors to remember that even if they couldn't see the change, that just being there was indeed making a difference.

As I listened to this mentor share, I choked back some of my own tears. I remember meeting those boys for the first time. I remember hearing about the monumental challenges they are facing. I remember the pain and chaos in these households. The pain may still be present. The challenges are still real. Many of the circumstances still remain. However, because of the simple act of being present once a week, a slow, meaningful and lasting change has begun.

Most weeks, it may not be exciting. The impact does not often come paired with epiphany-like conversations, tears, or a movie scene that brings chills. It looks like going to a movie and laughing together. It looks like going out to eat and not being sure of what to say. It looks like playing a board game together. It looks like listening to a fun song together. It looks like discovering what your "child of promise" enjoys doing. The change doesn't happen overnight, but it does happen.

How do you change the life of a child of promise? One bite at a time.

"Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better.  It's not."  

~Dr. Seuss

As a child, Dr. Seuss books seemed silly, fun and entertaining.  Green Eggs and Ham?  Sort of ridiculous?  Maybe, but did you know that Dr. Seuss purposefully created the story using just 50 words?  49 of them are monosyllabic.  He wrote it with the beginning reader in mind.  

The Cat in the Hat?  Yes, a little odd.  But did you know Dr. Seuss was challenged to write a book limited to 225 words, utilizing a list of 348 words every 6 year old at the time should know?  The story consists of 1629 words in length and uses a vocabulary of only 236 distinct words, of which 54 occur once and 33 twice.   Just one word – another – has three syllables, while 14 have two and the remaining 221 are monosyllabic. The longest words are something and playthings.  

You might be thinking:  {Interesting, but so what?}  Let me get to my point, which is this:  Sometimes all of our hard work and effort might seem mundane.  It might seem like a cutesy rhyme made up for a 6 year old.  We plan, we try, we try harder, hoping that we make a difference.  We make an organized effort.  But is it making any difference?  

Take a look at the quote at the top of this blog entry.  Nothing is going to get better unless someone like YOU cares a lot! Dr. Seuss's last book was Oh, the Places You'll Go.  It includes this line:
   "Will you succeed? Yes, you will indeed. (98 3/4% guaranteed.)"  

 That's what we want for the kids we're helping, isn't it?  We want them to succeed.  Right now, that might mean learning to read through Green Eggs and Ham.  Or learning to deal with a difficult classmate.  Or helping them cope with living in a broken family situation.   It takes some planning, putting together a process, and hoping we eventually see some results.  And in the meantime, trying to make it a bit fun and somewhat silly.